Thursday, April 26, 2012

New Study Finds Bumper Stickers Linked to Driving Skills!

I conducted the study, of course.

It's rock solid.

What I found is what you'd expect.

The people with the equivalent of an extensive Twitter feed plastered all over the back of their cars are horrid, distracted and inconsiderate drivers.

I followed a driver who I thought, based on her random braking, weaving and gunning the accelerator, was surely actually a chimpanzee or a small child, to a stoplight where I was surprised to see an adult human.

Prior to pulling up beside her and risking my own life, I had been subjected to her sticker graffiti, through which I could barely see what color her car was. I imagine her gas mileage was greatly reduced by her multitudinous mini lectures, political endorsements and incredible pithy, Nobel prize worthy wisdom communicated in sticker form.

Austinites seem to be particularly afflicted with stickeritis, and they are also the worst drivers in the world.

Game, set, match.

 I should have gotten a grant for this study. It's way more brilliant than the ones that people do get paid for that reveal brilliance like "drunk people fall down more" or "people with pretty hair get more dates."

Whatever, science. I beat you.

Now I made an absolute disaster of a card and I had to share the story. I wanted to use Silhouette Sentiments because I had a brilliant idea. Nope, that was a lie. It was actually on top of the stack of stamp sets on my floor. How glamorous is that? Design secrets of the stars! I knew I wanted to do emboss resist with watercolor, but when I was done coloring with reinkers it was so blah. So I took my Aquapainter and used Basic Grey reinker to outline the flowers. Now we're getting somewhere. Then I cut it out with my labels framelit and that is when it all started to go to hell in a handbasket.

I tried it on white. Boring. Matted it on black. Okay, better. Then I used a piece of embossed  Crumb Cake and put that all on a Crumb Cake base. I even took a PICTURE of it and Photoshopped it. Then, I admitted it was hideous. I won't even show it to you because you'd be scarred.

I ripped off the focal point and started over, and I'm glad I did, even though unsticking a dimensional is not for the faint of heart.

Pin It
Stamps: Netting, Silhouette Sentiments (Hostess)
Ink: Basic Black and reinkers: Poppy Parade, Summer Sun, Tempting Turquoise, 
Wisteria Wonder, Lucky Limeade, Basic Grey
Paper: Whisper White, Basic Black
Accessories: Labels Framelits

It's WAY better on black and white.

That background stamp is Netting. I love it.

Now just in case your favorite stamps and accessories are retiring, you better click here to order them - many items are already sold out!

Now I'm off to get my grant money. Here's a free, cute LOLcat video for you while you wait. Click here if you don't see a video player.


Loveyameanitbye.

2 comments:

  1. Two words: dental floss (for removing dimensionals, though mine have been pretty easy to pry off lately.)

    Outlining the flowers with Basic Gray was brilliant! I love the result.

    PS: I'm also glad I'm not the only one with disasters. :)

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  2. Haha, hilarious post, Lydia! I loved and completely agreed with your analogy to the amount of stickers on a car coincides to the ability of the driver to actually drive. . .you totally should get a grant for that :D Your card is lovely, and I'm forever making cards with stamp sets simply because they happen to be in my line of sight on my desk. . .so sad ;)

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